...the rippin' and the tearin'

I'm sure this has been posted a bunch of times, but it is literally too hilarious not to share.

Ladies, enjoy!

Red: I Should Tell Ya Momma On You

This artist's name is Red. He is a homeless man that lives (lived?) behind an Art Gallery in LA. Thanks, Marques.

Night Windows / Aside

Today is rough. I am struggling to get through after a long week and my office couldn't get any hotter here.

So, here is some chill music to relax to.

I've been a big Weakerthans's fan since college. Hope you enjoy.

Have a nice weekend




And, since I'm sure I'll feel better later, here is my favorite song they sing:

Wendy's Training Video Raps

There really are no words.

Hot Drinks


Cold Drinks

If You Struggle Naming Your Children, You Probably Have Too Many

Oh man...Antonio Cromartie coming through with the funny on Hard Knocks. Here he is attempting to name his eight children.

It's not the best quality, but that doesn't take away from how simply amazing this clip is.



Cromartie has fathered eight children with six women living in five states, and has been named in at least five paternity suits in the past two years. Classy.

The guy must have sperm that swims better than Phelps. Either way, 'Cro had one helluva 2007.

"I got Alonzo, who is 5, I have...uh, Karish, who is 3. I have Mi...Mike Jr., which is 3, I have a, my daugther - who just turned 3 as of...yesterday. Umm, I have another son named Tyler, that...he turns 3 in December. I got another, uhhh, daughter, who was born October 16 named London...uh, another daughter that was born, Nailioni, who was, uh...2 years old...and, uh...I have my newborn with my wife. Her name is Jersey."

English Bulldog Watching TV

Family Guy is her favorite.

Ha, this cracks me up to no end.

Is That Dog...a Tiger? Those Crazy Chinese!

China has granted us many a craze over here in the States: anime, video games, yellow fever, and delicious food among others. But, not every idea can be a winner nor am I entirely sure that I want to see this new fad take off. The latest out of China has dogs being dyed to look like other animals.

The idea of dog dyeing isn't exactly new in the land of Yao Ming. Stories began coming out in the last few years about a new trend in China in which people had their dogs dyed in multicolored, neon patterns. Frankly, this was strange enough for me, but some pet owners decided to take things up a notch. You want a pet tiger or panda, but have concerns about their natural wild animal instincts? Well, China has a solution for you!

(As always, click to expand)








I have to admit, the puppys that look like pandas are clearly adorable. And, let's be honest, this isn't the worst thing that China does to dogs. However, I do have concerns about lead-based paint being used, which could easily seep in through the skin or mouth. Also, in terms of a more abstract thought, I have concerns over the dog's psyche b/c let's face it, this is absolutely ridiculous. But, it's not like China has cornered the market on people doing things to embarass their dogs.

Epic Hip Hop Covers

This first one is by a guy named Lewis Floyd Henry. He is genuinely talented, but this Wu-Tang cover is on another level. Check it out.



The second one is "Bitches Ain't Shit" by Dr. Dre. This version is a cover from a Columbia (what up, Marques!)/Barnard a cappella group, Bacchantae. The music is by Ben Folds.

60 Foot Rope Swing

I'd like to say that I would do this, but...



Whatever...I would do it.

Dancing Panda

Take that, Sneezing Panda!

Hanuman

Hey hey. Sorry to anyone that reads my blog here b/c I have been majorly neglecting it this week. I could come out with some excuses about it being my birthday, I was out two days of work, blah blah blah, but really...it had more to do with neglect than anything. Like a deadbeat dad, I generally have no reason for not following through with the upkeep around here. Hopefully this Friday's music will help make ammends.

Normally, I would title this post from some of the lyrics included within the song. However, this Friday's artist, Rodrigo y Gabriela, have no lyrics in their music. Rather, they let their fingers do the singing.

Rodrigo y Gabriela are a Mexican musical duo who specialize in playing fast, rhythmic acoustic guitars. The duo's members are Rodrigo Sánchez, lead guitar, and Gabriela Quintero, rhythm guitar. The duo met while living in Mexico City, where they both played in a thrash metal band. However, they moved to Europe, dissatisfied with the local music scene, the duo moved to Europe where their careers took off due to various breaks and help from artists, such as Damien Rice.

It is impossible to truly appreciate their musical styling without seeing them perform live. It is difficult to even describe the fever with which Gabriela attacks her guitar, accounting for the percussion section of their band, while Rodrigo picks his guitar apart. I'll stop rambling now. Have a look and a listen to their newest video.

Dwyane Wade Blocking Little Kids

To be a champion, you can't let anyone score easily. Especially 10 and unders.

Dwyane Wade blocking childrens' shots from John Karalis on Vimeo.

Strangest Wedding First Dance. Ever.

What the shit were these people thinking? What were the guests thinking?

Nothing says romance like dressing up like a pirate and fighting a bunch of ninjas.

Take That Gun, Girl, and Blow My Mind

It has truly been a solid while since a song has come along that straight rocked my fucking socks off on the first listen. Starting off with an orchestral series of guitar and percusion thunderous blasts, The Virginmarys's song "Bang Bang Bang" immediately grabs ahold of your eardrums' attention and yanks them into the melody. After that, it's all on the Zeppelin-esque guitar thrashing and lead singer, well, I don't know his name actually. The band is extremely new apparently and I really can't find any information about them. But, who cares?! Listen to the song from this new band, apparently from the UK, and enjoy. However, take heed, b/c you may find yourself listening to this song all day. Personally, I know that I'll be blasting it, once it's time to leave work, with the windows down, screaming along.

Anti-Drug PSA: Ninja Turtles & Pee Wee

Thanks to the Ninja Turtles and Pee-Wee Herman, legions of children have stayed away from weed and crack!

Fallen Disney Princesses

Dina Goldstein is based in Vancouver, B.C. A renowned photographer, Goldstein is known for her ability to juggle unique portraits with editorial, commercial, and athletic photography that have earned her praise and awards from high-profile magazines and critical praise. However, in my opinion, Goldstein's most interesting and through-provoking work comes from her series "Fallen Princesses." In this series, Goldstein provides a real-world (and cynical) vision of what happens when real life cold cocks the traditional notion of the Disney 'happily ever after' and subsequently occurs thereafter.

In her own words, Goldstein states: "Fallen Princesses place Fairy Tale characters in modern day scenarios. In all of the images, the Princess is placed in an environment that articulates her conflict. The '...happily ever after' is replaced with a realistic outcome and addresses current issues." It is interesting to note that Goldstein never read or was read fairy tales as a child. Therefore, in her opinion, the traditional Disney story archetype does not make sense. Goldstein continues: "The Disney versions almost always have a sad beginning, with an overbearing female villian, and the end is a perfectly happy one. The Prince usually saves the day and makes the victimized young beauty into a Princess...I began to imagine Disney's perfect Princesses juxtaposed with real issues that were affecting women around me, such as illness, addiction and self-image issues."

Whatever your take is on the stories of our youth, it is impossible to argue with the powerful nature of Goldstein's images. Have a look.





I love what Goldstein has done with these photos. It's very strange seeing Snow White, Cinderella, Rapunzel, Red Riding Hood (not so little anymore), Sleeping Beauty, Jasmine, The Princess and the Pea, Ariel, and Belle in more troubled times. Especially when we are predisposed to this image:

Angry Pandas!

WHY ARE THESE PANDAS SO ANGRY?!?!?

Office


Kitchen


Supermarket


Hospital


I found a quick translation for the Hospital spot:
The nurse asks the patient if he wants Panda cheese, and he says he is not in the mood for eating.

Nurse: I got your breakfast, i made you some cheese sandwiches.

Patient: No thanks i'm not in the mood to eat.

Narrator: No one says no to Panda.

Funniest Rollercoaster Faces

It's a life truth, impossible to escape from, along the lines of death and paying taxes: people always make funny faces on roller coasters. The inclusion of cameras that snap your picture right at a certain key moment on the ride, while more than likely invented as a "keepsake" to make more money, has yielded hilarious pictures that will continue to exist in all infamy on the internet for ages. In fact, one of the funniest NSFW websites I have ever come across (Flash Mountain) details a craze amongst Disney patrons where a female flashes the camera right as the flash bulb captures a moment for purchase at a kiosk. Oh, and be careful of that link because it does involve nudity. However, as noted on Snopes, if someone's boobs do pop out, apparently you can ride Spash Mountain again for free. However, its racist Br'er Rabbit iconography is still present. Open to debate, I suppose. In any case, before I go down another tangent, here are some of the funniest rollercoaster pictures that I have seen. As always, click to enlarge.

Enjoy!

Josh Ritter: 'Lantern' Surprise

I am a huge Josh Ritter fan and I've written about him prior, right after I saw him play for the first time. He is definitely one of the best artists and live performers that I have ever had the pleasure of seeing.

While I normally only post music on Friday's, this was too cool not to share right away. Someone at the concert passed out glo-sticks to everyone at the show and they all broke them out when he performed his song 'Lantern' and it made it an easily rememerable moment. Check it out.

County Law! County Law!

I literally cannot stop laughing at this video. It gets better every time.

Art: Nice and Toasty!

I love toast. I love to eat it with jelly, baconlettucetomato, maybe some butter, cream cheese...really, so long as it's not too burnt, you can eat toast in any manner that your heart (and tastebuds) desires. But, I must admit that I haven't thought of toast as anything but crispy, warm bread meant to be eaten. Enter Maurice Bennett, The Toastman.

Maurice, a Kiwi with a background in Civil Engineering, worked at a grocery store at a young age. The job appealed to him, to the point that he and his wife eventually purchased a grocery store of their own, which became very successful. However, the Island Bay New World Supermarket has since been sold as Maurice is a full-time artist. The biography on his website states: "His exhibitions of toast art works that have been inspired by Tapa Cloth, Maori Carvings, and Pacific patterns have received appreciative reviews from Art critics worldwide, with comparisons of the toast colours complimenting such traditional art forms. Today Maurice continues to push the barriers in his use of toast as an artistic medium – adding collage to his work, cut shapes from the slices of toast, and creating of three-dimensional images." Here is a video, from Maurice himself, discussing his background and artistic evolution, from the NZ show, The Gravy:

As always, click to enlarge